Help with lyrics

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Usastratguy
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Help with lyrics

Post by Usastratguy » February 15th, 2018, 10:44 am

"Unsure of the way things are going
But i don't worry about a thing
The nightmare will surely end soon
The climb is always the hardest part
But the descent will be bittersweet"

That is a song I'm trying to write. It's a song about a man that is just struggling in everything in his life. But somehow he remains calm and at peace. I see so many countless lIves lost to depression. This is a song I want to throw out there and let everyone know it's okay. Life can be really really hard and slap you in the face but you will overcome.

Anyone care to help out with some lyrics?

OwenEvans
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Re: Help with lyrics

Post by OwenEvans » February 25th, 2018, 11:12 am

Cool lyrics, do you see that more as the verse or the chorus of the song?

For me it sounds like the first verse - do you feel the song will be uplifting/empowering one, or more reflective? Happy to chip in with some lyrics, wanted to get your thoughts on where you feel the song was taking you before suggesting something

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KR2
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Re: Help with lyrics

Post by KR2 » May 17th, 2018, 11:33 am

Unsure of the way things are going
But don’t worry about those things
That nightmare is just a bad dream
And a side road of what's to be.

And if it was easy, girl,
There would be no song,
Nothing worthy of singing
and nothing worthwhile to recall.

Plan for a lifetime together, dear
And for granted, don’t assume it to be
Let’s take one day at a time, love,
But realize it’s never guaranteed.

Stay true to yourself, my love
And in your dreams to be
I pray that you will, my love,
Truly stay true to me.
It's the rock that gives the stream its music . . . and the stream that gives the rock its roll.

chefie
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Re: Help with lyrics

Post by chefie » May 19th, 2018, 6:00 am

You've certainly made some progress since your last posting. Just some thoughts . . . . . . . your last 2 verses seem to be the beginning of the story for me. You've a relationship that hopefully will last but you're going to take it one day at a time while being, hopefully, each true to one's self and each other. That's when, IMO, the first two verses should then follow explaining that it's not always a smooth road and it's the ability to overcome the difficult parts that makes the relationship memorable.


As far as the structure . . . . . you're last two verses bring in some rhyme while the first two don't. Seems to interrupt the flow.

Maybe some clarification on this line . . .
And for granted, don’t assume it to be

Do you mean
"don't take it for granted . . . . don't assume it to be?"
Too, you have some repetition
"Truly stay true to me"
Maybe something like
"Forever stay true to me"
or something along those lines.



Good start! Would love to hear you put some music to it.

Thanks for sharing.

Neil

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