Search found 5348 matches

by rparker
February 25th, 2014, 2:20 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12W17 Opposites Attract
Replies: 6
Views: 1166

Re: Y12W17 Opposites Attract

Same thing with the final chorus. Instead of "He's not pregnant, but she is," I think it would be better to say "the baby is his." The way it's said aids the opposites theme, but I would otherwise agree. .... "he's an extrovert......." In my profession, software engineer, an introvert looks at his ...
by rparker
February 24th, 2014, 7:44 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Year 12 - Week 14 - Dances with Ghosts - Take-2
Replies: 13
Views: 2633

Re: Year 12 - Week 14 - Dances with Ghosts - Take-2

Here's the latest version. I changed quite a few of the lines around to make things sort of fit and flow better. I changed the bridge sections around, but I'm still not thrilled with the ending of the bridge right before the final chorus. I also did a proper mix-down and polished it up quite a bit. ...
by rparker
February 24th, 2014, 7:31 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12W17 Opposites Attract
Replies: 6
Views: 1166

Re: Y12W17 Opposites Attract

Catchy little number. Good job on the harmonies and love the ending. The whole songs sounds like something out of the early 60's song charts. Nice changes throughout. On the lyric front, and this is a little nit or two, I sort of felt like I was expecting something along the lines of a resolution or...
by rparker
February 20th, 2014, 6:06 am
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Year 12 - Week 14 - Dances with Ghosts - Take-2
Replies: 13
Views: 2633

Re: Year 12 - Week 14 - Dances with Ghosts - With Song Link

Alrighty, I did the song. I've been sitting on it for a couple of days. I have changes that I want to make, but I figured I'd share the first real version. Here it is. http://soundclick.com/share.cfm?id=12692690 I'm quite fond of the overall sound, which was impossible for me to say a little over a ...
by rparker
February 19th, 2014, 3:28 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12 - W16 - 1964
Replies: 9
Views: 1993

Re: Y12 - W16 - 1964

How about changing "in far off lagoons" to "in Asian lagoons?" That at least gives a hint. Interesting thought. :D Also interesting is that two people to make mention of that line deduced the same and proper response. To me, that's a perfect example to back up your other comment. (you and my wife b...
by rparker
February 19th, 2014, 4:13 am
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12, W16....1964
Replies: 5
Views: 1166

Re: Y12, W16....1964

I wonder if the years progression verses could be more interesting if done as sort of an energy building bridge type of thing? Something tells me they at least belong back to back and not separated by a chorus. Other than that and other suggestions and tips mentioned earlier, it should be a cool tun...
by rparker
February 19th, 2014, 4:03 am
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12W16 -1964-
Replies: 7
Views: 1235

Re: Y12W16 -1964-

I think it works. It's got a good, early era Punk vibe to it.
by rparker
February 19th, 2014, 3:48 am
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12W15 - School Days, Cruel Days
Replies: 8
Views: 1234

Re: Y12W15 - School Days, Cruel Days

I had thought a couple lines to be a mouthful to get out, but you made it work just fine. I kept waiting for another line in the choruses, along the lines of a resolution of sorts. The minor chord suggestion might work. something along the lines of what you have, but with a second iteration ending w...
by rparker
February 18th, 2014, 8:25 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12 - W16 - 1964
Replies: 9
Views: 1993

Re: Y12 - W16 - 1964

Does "fab four, by air" mean that they came to the U.S. on a plane or that the TV broadcasts were over the air? It was meant by plane, as if to tie in to the Paul Revere's ride based on the lights in the church steeple in Boston. I don't get the reference to "far off lagoons." Vietnam? Yeah, that o...
by rparker
February 18th, 2014, 7:09 am
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12 - W16 - 1964
Replies: 9
Views: 1993

Re: Y12 - W16 - 1964

Thanks for the notes everyone. All good stuff. If I do the song and if it becomes faster paced, I will probably have to at least expand the and of the verse theme that's repeated. I don't remember why I left one out now. That was so one day ago. I think because I had nothing further to say than it w...
by rparker
February 17th, 2014, 7:48 am
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Y12 - W16 - 1964
Replies: 9
Views: 1993

Y12 - W16 - 1964

What an interesting assignment. It's quite hard to write about a year you were not exactly awake for. I looked through a few "year in review" types of web sites and wasn't finding myself inspired. Something occurred to me as a result of some pretty impressive First-Grade level math skills. The Briti...
by rparker
February 14th, 2014, 7:10 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Year 12 - Week 14 - Dances with Ghosts - Take-2
Replies: 13
Views: 2633

Re: Year 12 - Week 14 - Dances with Ghosts - Take-2

This song got an overhaul. It all started with the additional character. Then a story of sorts. Then some song re-structure, etc, etc. In short, this song has been a very big learning experience. This is much different from a modular song that is simply about something. The linear nature of a story ...
by rparker
February 10th, 2014, 2:31 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: 12/14 Bob Dylan's Selling Cars
Replies: 10
Views: 1207

Re: 12/14 Bob Dylan's Selling Cars

Too many good songs of his to remember them all, much less fit them into a song like this. :)

I wish I was enjoying mine more these days, but hopefully soon. It's my favorite way to travel. :)
by rparker
February 10th, 2014, 12:58 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: 12/14 Bob Dylan's Selling Cars
Replies: 10
Views: 1207

Re: 12/14 Bob Dylan's Selling Cars

Hey man, that was cool. I enjoyed it. Songs like this always make me wait for my favorite element, as in my favorite Dylan tune getting worked in. Alas, hard to imagine how to fit "Just Like Tm Thumb's Blues" into anything automobile related. :lol: Well done, and I thought a big win on the tune sele...
by rparker
February 10th, 2014, 12:41 pm
Forum: Sunday Songwriters Group
Topic: Year 12 - Week 14 - Dances with Ghosts - Take-2
Replies: 13
Views: 2633

Re: Year 12 - Week 14 - Dances with Ghosts - Take-2

Hmmmm, that's a pretty good idea. I've been connecting her to the town through the man in the Dance Hall tragedy in my mind and have gone so far as to think of her as being there as a bit of a reward for the good life he's led or something to that affect after the tragedy/fire. Almost a pre-conceive...